It Ain’t Always Easy

Life at the Richmond house has been a little chaotic lately. And when I say chaotic, I mean full out insanity. It happens nearly every June. I take an already busy month of birthdays and cram in additional items till my cup overrunneth.

This year I added two online courses, selling my house, packing & moving in 20 days on top of running my own business. See? Chaos!

Even though all this chaos (read: change) is a good thing, it’s still change and your soul/body/heart/brain can only take so much before something has to give. For me that means a total breakdown:

  • Crying
  • Self-Doubt
  • Yelling (Not proud of this)
  • Overall sense of hopelessness

That was me the other day. Fine one minute, then a snotty mess the next. Following your heart isn’t easy. No one said it was…at least I sure didn’t. It’s the reason why in the past I’ve taken the easier path at the crossroads. It takes energy, commitment and maybe a wee bit o’insanity.

Follow Your Heart vs Follow Your Head

For me, Follow Your Head means taking the path I’m familiar with. It’s the path that kept me trudging along, doing mindless work in a business atmosphere that left me counting down the days till retirement. (31 years…if you’d like to know)

It was safe. I knew the work. I got up each morning, took the bus to work, clocked in 8 hours, took the bus home. Repeat. I received the steady paycheck, the health benefits, pension etc. Like I said, it was safe. It was also damn unfulfilling and BORING!

I can pinpoint 3 major crossroads in my life. 3 moments in time when I had the opportunity to change my path. Twice I chickened out and kept on the Follow Your Head path. Although I can say with all honesty my decisions eventually led me in the right direction, I know now that this last crossroads I was meant to take the Follow Your Heart path.

And I am. And it’s difficult. I’m like a salmon swimming against the current. It’s worth it in the end but HOLY CRAP it ain’t always easy!

So what keeps me going? Because really, I’m not going to lie, there are days when giving up seems like the only option. Well I’ll tell you, my pretties.

  1. All the greatest people in life succeeded in the face of challenges. It was hard and they persevered. I want my name beside theirs on the list of AWESOME!
  2. I already know where the Follow Your Head path leads. I’ve been actively following it for 33 years. (Okay maybe not since I was a baby but for arguments sake let’s say I was.)It leads to Ho Hum, BORING, SAFE, MEANINGLESS, ZZZZZZ.(At least for me. Results may vary. Though I suspect if you’re still reading this you probably feel the same.)
  3. I am stubborn as HELL. Once I set my mind to something, good gravy there’s no stopping me. Just ask my mom or my husband.
  4. I LOVE what I do. I LOVE coaching. I LOVE writing. I LOVE creating art. And I think I DESERVE to LOVE what I do for the rest of my life. (See stubborn as HELL note above) (PS…YOU DESERVE IT TOO!)

Now I know that everyone’s idea of following your heart is different. There are just as many people who look at my office job and think Wow! I want that! as there are who agree with the comical description of office life in the movie Office Space. (Who wouldn’t like to burn down their office! Right? Right? Not that I would EVER do that – joking aside)

I’m not telling you that your job/life sucks. Only you know if it does or not. But what I am saying – even advocating – is that whatever you do it life, make it GOOD. Make it your OWN and for pity’s sake ENJOY it!

If you aren’t happy with something, change it. Yes, it will be difficult. Yes, you might turn into a snotty mess occasionally until you achieve it (whatever it is) but in the end it will worth every hill you had to climb, every rock in your shoe and every skinned knee you received from a fall that you didn’t see coming. It will be difficult but I guarantee it will be EXCITING!

Or you could take the safe path.

Because I’m all about sharing experiences, I’m going to write about my crossroad moments in a three-part series. It’s my hope that you’ll see a bit of yourself in these posts and find the courage to take the Follow Your Heart path the next time it comes up. Remember, I chickened out twice before I finally plucked up the courage to change my direction. I know you can too!

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